Unsent Letters by Heather Mark

Dear Dr. Marc Weissbluth,

Your book “Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child” was recommended to me by a coworker. I was so excited to work your plan when my baby was born, I really thought it would make my baby into a boy wonder. I found that the more I read and the older my baby got, the more turned off I was by your method. I shelved the book for a while and waited until just the other day to go back to it.

My baby is now five months old. While I’m still not willing to let him cry in his crib for a full hour when he doesn’t want to sleep, your sleep cycle graphic has done wonders for me. As soon as I put him on the sleep schedule you recommended, and let him cry when he wakes up at 2 or 3 am, his whole demeanor changed. I never imagined that he was waking up for any other reason besides being hungry. You put it all in perspective for me when you said it wasn’t fair to get him out of bed and force him to eat when he wasn’t hungry. That is something I never would have imagined on my own.

Thank you so much, Dr. Weissbluth. I hope we will continue to have successful nights (and naps!)

Best to you,

Heather Mark

Dear Baby Einstein,

I am a very weary new mom. Thank you so much for saving my sanity. You see, my three month old son is not the independent type. If he isn’t being held he cries like somebody lit his diaper on fire. But by some miracle of distraction, your Baby Einstein videos entertain him to no end.

It never occurred to me that a baby born just a handful of weeks ago, with limited eyesight no less, could enjoy television. Don’t get me wrong, I don’t want to be one of those moms who dumps their kid in front of the TV just to get him out of her hair. It’s just that Baby Beethoven keeps him quiet and happy for a little while, long enough for me to take a shower or sit here writing a letter to you.

Let’s be honest, who wants to be up at 6am on a Saturday if they don’t have to? Not me. Last night was long, I’m pretty sure my baby will never sleep through the night. Not even a gargantuan cup of coffee was working for me this morning. I plopped little baby in his Boppy chair in front of his Baby Einstein and I enjoyed some wake up time to myself on the couch.

Thank you, Baby Einstein. You are a diamond in the rough.

Groggily yours,

Heather Mark

Dear Guy Sitting in 21F,

I understand this airline has an open seating policy. In fact, I’ve worked for this airline since 2002 so I’m quite familiar with most of its policies. The thing about open seating is it’s full of surprises. You never know whom, if anyone, you’ll be sitting next to.

When I boarded, I was the very last person on. I was carring a car seat (with a baby in it), a car seat base, a diaper bag and one other carry on. I quickly settled in right behind you in row 22, which was the only open row on the plane. I installed my car seat in 22F and I sat in 22E.

I found it quite presumptuous of you to ask me to move my car seat to the aisle seat because it inconvenienced your reclinability. Normally I would feel bad for you because you couldn’t recline, but seeing as I was the last one to board and the front door of the aircraft was already closed I had no time to move the car seat. Not to mention it’s illegal to place a car seat in the aisle seat. When I pointed out the two empty seats next to you, both of which had a full spectrum of reclinability, you gave me attitude.

Perhaps if you’d offered me a hand in getting settled or just been courteous to me, I’d be more inclined to rearrange myself so you could recline 21F. But you were a jerk and no amount of trying to force your seat back repeatedly only to be blocked by my car seat was going to get me to move over. You’re a grown man, sir, an not much of a gentleman. A gentleman would have realized how preoccupied I was traveling alone with a newborn and all his gear and quietly sat in an adjacent empty seat.

I suppose, Mr. 21F, what I want is for you to learn some manners. But seeing as you made it 40something years without absorbing those lessons I understand you won’t be changing your ways. Good luck in the future, sir. Your method hasn’t worked so far, I encourage you to continue behaving badly for another 40 years. See where it takes you.

Whatever,

Heather