Unsent Letters by Heather Mark

Dear The Nest,

I believe I got on your mailing list when I signed up for The Knot during my wedding planning. Suddenly after my wedding date I started getting a free subscription to your magazine.

I’m very concerned about the content in your publication. I can tell by looking at the cover and reading your features that you cater to an upscale clientele. But if you’ll notice, the little interjections here and there about the unhealthy financial state of your readers is disheartening. You must either stop trying to sell an upperclass lifestyle to 25 year old newlyweds, or you must begin quoting readers who actually are part of the wealthy set.

For example, on page 96 of the winter 2008 issue, you advise a woman not to close a credit card account that she is no longer using because it will affect her credit score. News flash: Our country is being torn limb from limb because the government and the citizens are all living out a credit fantasy. We cannot live healthy and build wealth on a debt laden house of cards. Credit scores only matter to people who need credit. What about getting a mortgage? A good mortgage underwriter knows when a homebuyer has strong financials. A credit score isn’t going keep a person in an apartment forever.

Oh, and that question is faced next to an American Express ad. Lost your job? Got no emergency fund? Just get another credit card. Look how well credit works for our government!

On page 105 you say, “Remember that shouldering some debt is okay.” I’m tearing my hair out at this one! NO DEBT is the only kind of “okay” debt. The only debt any of us should shoulder is a mortgage. Everything else needs to be paid of as quickly as possible, that means taking a second job and selling some stuff to make it happen. NO DEBT IS GOOD DEBT.

On page 121, a reader confesses to having “a secret credit card just for shoe shopping.” Is that supposed to be a cute comment? eHarmony.com lists financial woes as the number one reason for divorce. How could you, in good conscience, print this immature, idiotic remark from a girl who thinks keeping secrets and spending money she doesn’t have is okay in her marriage? Fortunately, another woman in a much healthier state of mind says, “I save up just so I can spurge on facials, pedicures and massages.” That’s how it should be.

Please, The Nest, your readers need a dose of tough love. They need to know that debt and credit and secrets are not a foundation on which to build a healthy marriage. Tell it like it is. Let’s create a stable future for ourselves.

Thanks,

Heather Mark

Source: http://marriage.eharmony.com/advice/marriage-save-12.html

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